It happens everytime. It's an undeniable fact of life. There aren't too many sure things in this world, but this is one of them: the first day of kindergarten causes tears. Now, to the less experienced person, it would be logical to assume that it's the kids doing the crying (or perhaps, even the teachers), but the strange and surprising truth is that it's the MOMS.
Tuesday of this week was my third and final first day of kindergarten. It was met with the usual first-day excitement: everyone in the house is up early, breakfast is substantial, clothes are carefully laid out from the night before, and everyone seems to be watching the clock in anticipation. (Now if your home is like mine, then you already know that next week will be a sharp contrast: I'll have to roll the kids out of bed, throw a pop-tart at them, dig through the dirty clothes to find a "cleanish" pair of socks, and we'll all be watching the clock in desperation!)
The first day of kindergarten is definitely special. It is a once-in-a-lifetime milestone that must be captured on film in some capacity. It is the beginning of growing up for our children and letting go for us moms. I read somewhere that some women don't do it at all, and few women do it well, but that letting go of our children is the most delicate and important thing we can do. I can say that it's completely unnatural, it tears open a mom's heart, and it requires more discipline and self-control than I will ever have without the intervention of the Holy Spirit.
But Whit did fine. He strolled right into the classroom, found his seat, and began cutting and glueing like a pro. As I squatted down next to him to tell him what a big boy he was, I realized he wasn't listening, and I was just an intrusion now. It was time to go.
As I left the school, I was crying for many reasons: sadness that my "baby" was no longer a baby, gratefulness that I knew I was leaving him with a godly woman and teacher who is truly called to this agegroup, and fear of what awaits him that I can no longer protect him from.
I was crying because Whit was growing up. And I was also crying for Paul... who won't.
4 comments:
"it's completely unnatural, it tears open a mom's heart, and it requires more discipline and self-control than I will ever have without the intervention of the Holy Spirit."
Perfect.
I dropeed my first baby off for her first day of kinder Monday. Being a former teacher, I thought I'd handle it like a "pro" - uhhh, not so much! I did manage to hold it together until I had actually dropeed her off and headed back to the car. As I was preparing for this momentous occasion, I thought and prayed alot for you and Anna Jane's mom. I'm a former student of your husband and have followed your family blog for a long time which led me to your personal blog. I just want to say thank you, from one mama to another, for being so real and honest. You'll never know how many people are inspired by and look up to you as a true woman of God.
Julie in Denton
Leigh! I love reading your blog. Thanks for sharing your journey. The wisdom you have always inspires me in my own walk. You are allowing God to teach you so many things and it is beautiful. No one would fault you for just saying forget it all! You bring glory to Him even in the bitterness of your loss. You are finding true life and that is cool!
Glad you survived the first day of Kindergarten. Our oldest son Mitch just started high school and I swear just yesterday I was feeling funny about dropping him off to walk in the school by himself after the first week of kindergarten. It goes fast but the ride is sweet!
I think of you often and pray for your family. May your school year be blessed!
Marthanne
Dallas
Yay! You adjusted the comments section so now I can write all my smart alek responses for all to see - hee hee, and thanks!
I knew you'd cry, and I knew you'd survive with grace and wisdom ... and so would the Whitster. Many of us cried these same tears in recent days. Yes, I did too! Watching her walk into that huge building was really bittersweet for me.
I knew you'd miss Paul - we all will the whole rest of our lives - wondering what he would be like in this year. Guess this way we can make him the perfect child, everything we each dreamed for him to be with each passing year! We'll compare dreams along the way...
Love, Laura
Great work.
Post a Comment